well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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