she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
