I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
