3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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