it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize