I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize