i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
