I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Randomize
