I think I died a long time ago.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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