I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
