She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize