so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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