it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize