We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
