You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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