Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
