whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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