You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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