And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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