just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
