I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
