he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize