I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Best friends brother. Beat that.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize
