You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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