Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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