Umm I'm too high to move.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
