Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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