So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
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