Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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