this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
