No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
