We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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