At least make sure they are 18
Why
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
