I got chris browned last night
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
