is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
