i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
