maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Randomize