Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize
