my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
