Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
you told grandpa to call you daddy
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
