DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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