i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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