I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
