I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
