Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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