after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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