Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
