i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
