Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
