Did you just see the Batmobile???
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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