No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
