oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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