Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
high people should be assigned attendants
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize